Being someone who lives near the Gulf coast, the term I loathe above all others in hurricane season is "hunker down." Tell me to take precautions, evacuate, get ready - just don't tell me to hunker down! Now that we are in "coronavirus season," the term I despise is "the new normal." There is nothing about the way we are living now that is normal. I was laid off from my job and have not been able to get unemployment. We only go to the grocery store when we absolutely have to, and we wear a mask, avoid other shoppers, and get out as soon as possible.
My daughter can't work one of her jobs right now. It is a beauty supply chain that has shut down for now. She was lucky in that they are still paying employees 60% of their salaries. She also works for Target and has been working a lot of hours there. Yes, that makes me nervous. Honestly, it makes her nervous, too. She has always suffered from anxiety, and at times lately, it has been raging. She has been having trouble sleeping. She is somewhat frightened of getting the virus. Having had asthma as a child, she worries she would be more susceptible. How I wish I could see her and hug her!
I have watched so much TV that sometimes I cannot bring myself to turn it on! I have gotten well-acquainted with Alexa and she plays some great music for me whenever I ask. I have cross stitched, gardened, done some yard work and cleaning with my husband, but I feel somewhat forlorn and a little useless right now.
Speaking of my husband, the quarantine has not hurt our relationship. I am sure that there are others who can't say that, but we are good together - even when it's 24/7. We occasionally watch Netflix or Amazon together. Other times, he is upstairs watching one thing on TV while I am downstairs doing something else. But it's comforting to each of us that the other is close by.
My heart really breaks for families who were living paycheck-to-paycheck as so many of us do, but are unable to earn a living right now. They worry about paying for rent and food during this trying time. I cry for families who have lost a loved one - some more than one. It is so sad when someone has to die alone in a hospital because their family is not allowed to be with them for fear of being infected. I marvel at the men and women working in hospitals in any capacity - doctor, nurse, therapist, housekeeper, etc. - who put in long hours caring for sick people at a risk to themselves. They put in long day after long day and some do succumb to the virus.
I also an outraged by people who are too stupid to adhere to quarantine and social distancing. I am a Christian but I know that God understands why now is not a good time to be in church. Participate in an online service; read your Bible; pray whenever you want for as long as you want. I believe that preachers who are encouraging people to come to church just want to make themselves into religious martyrs.
I am livid over hackers, schemers, and thieves during such a difficult time, more than during "normal" times. Those who are trying to scam people out of their much-needed stimulus money should be shot. Low lives taking advantage of people's and charities' generosity and turning around to sell the donations are despicable. My daughter and her roommate each had their vehicles broken into on separate occasions. It seems they were looking for money. My daughter keeps little of value in her car, but the roll of quarters she had for the laundromat was taken.
I am a little tired of hearing how we are in this together, especially from celebrities. I am sure it's not hard to self-isolate when you have every comfort of home available. They can have whatever they want delivered to them. They can perform or be guests on shows remotely. They can be lauded for their generosity while staying safely in their palatial homes. We are not in this together - we are each in it on our own, each with our own set of circumstances.
I honestly am not wallowing in any kind of self-pity. Yes, I get sad and depressed. Yes, I worry about what is to come. I also am grateful to have a roof over my head and food to eat - a little too much junk food though! I do have trouble seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. But for now, we are all in limbo in the "new abnormal."
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