I remember when I was a child and summer seemed to last forever. I spent a lot of time watching TV and playing with the neighborhood kids. And every summer, my family would spend two weeks at my grandmother's house in North Carolina where my mother grew up. In fact, back then, summer seemed to last so long that I would get totally bored. Of course, those were the days before cable television, laptop computers, and video games.
When my kids were little, summer was fun. They would play in the sprinkler or in their inflatable pool (until their father blew it up with water dynamite!). They would go to camp at their daycare where every day promised a new adventure - swimming, bowling, video games, field trips - they were worn out by the time they got home. It was great - no homework to do, which was a break for me, too!
When the kids got a little older, summers meant summer reading lists. Summer reading lists meant I would harass them all summer about getting their books read. "Read a little at a time - don't wait until the last minute," i would nag, not that it ever worked. Many times, I would read their books before they did, and once they read them, we could discuss them.
When Jess was in 4th grade, she was finally diagnosed with ADD. I knew there was something going on, but didn't have the knowledge to pinpoint it. (That subject will have to be a future blog entry all on its own!) Thanks to an observant teacher, and then a psychologist, we found out what was going on. One thing I found out is that Jess learns better from hearing books read than from reading them herself. So, I would find some quiet time with her and I would read "doses" of the books to her. She remembered it so much better, plus we could talk about what happened.
Then in high school, my son did marching band and my daughter did Colorguard. So they each had band camp before school started. Plus, Colorguard practiced all through the summer. Louisiana is known for hot, humid, rainy summers, so that always made it fun!
As they each got to about 16 years old, then they discovered summer jobs. It was very cool to see them take responsibility for going to work whenever they were scheduled, and learning to manage their money. Spending money is a lot different when you think about how many hours you had to work for it. My daughter was the real go-getter - she would have two summer jobs.
In college, we made it clear that school came before jobs...that school was the primary job always. Come summer, we encouraged part-time jobs, especially if they wanted to go anywhere or do anything! Most of the time, Tyler had rotten luck. He would go on interviews and be told how wonderful he was. They would say that they will call him in a few days - if not, he should call then. And they wouldn't call. And he would call them. And he would be told that someone would call him back, but they never did.
Jess always had at least one summer job. And she is quickly learning that if you go everywhere and do everything, your account gets depleted fast. So right now, she is in the process of trying to rebuild her funds - for more summer adventures and for her first apartment in the fall.
Now that Tyler is a college graduate, he is already learning a harsh reality of being an adult. Each weekday during the summer, while the neighborhood kids are sleeping late and playing all day, he has to get up early and work for eight hours. Being a grownup is highly overrated!
Last month, my baby boy, Tyler, finally graduated from college. He was on the five year plan. Tyler was my gifted kid who taught himself to read at the age of four. He could spell any word, and read thick novels by second grade. But when he got to about 5th grade, schoolwork got harder, and he didn't feel like trying very hard. He was the boy who should have had a 4.0 in high school. But he was somewhere in the middle of the rankings.
Tyler took the ACT three times. He got a 27 the first and second times, and a 30 on the final try. He was awarded a distinguished freshman award and a marching band scholarship, plus he was accepted into the Honors College. He also got the top level TOPS award from the state that paid basic tuition plus a stipend. But before marching band camp was into the third day, Ty decided he hated marching band and didn't want to do that. And he decided that he no longer wanted to major in music - that his passion was Physics. His father and I scrambled to line up financial aid that we wouldn't have needed if he stayed in marching band, and were supportive of his major change. If I had a do over....
Tyler and his roommate spent a lot of time gaming. I'm not sure what else they did, but going to class and studying wasn't high on their list of to do items. Tyler finished his first semester with a .1 grade point average. You can't do much worse than that. He got rid of the girlfriend who was a large part of the distraction, changed majors to Marketing, and did better semester number two. His TOPS was gone, never to be regained. His scholarships were gone forever. But Tyler hung in there, through Latin, French, classes he liked, and classes he hated. He changed majors again, to Moving Image Arts, which we just started calling film to make it easier for other people.
In his final year, he had a Capstone Project to do, a group effort. In essence, his group wrote, produced, and edited a film. They had to line up actors, find a musicians, shoot, get voiceovers done, and have a finished product to show an audience at the end of the semester. As always, I fretted and sweat with him, worrying about whether or not the film would get finished. As passive as my son can be, he did persevere and wound up with a film. Will it be nominated for an Academy Award? Not just unlikely, but no way! But that's okay because in my eyes, he got the big prize - his bachelor's degree!
I think I was more excited that he was about the actual graduation ceremony. Okay, I know I was. And I even got teared up a couple of times. This was the moment I had waited five years for! I told him a number of times - you may not appreciate that piece of paper right now, or a year from now, but there will come a time in your like when you are glad that you worked to achieve that degree. For days afterward, I would wake up in the morning and it would hit me all over again - I was the mother of a college graduate!
Within two weeks, Tyler had a job interview with a company that develops and produces video games, and about a week after that, he started his first week of training. At the end of the week, he had to pass a test to stay on. He passed! The company offers a year contract and then decides whether or not to keep the person on staff. So Tyler is back at home for now so he can save money. Once he is a full-fledged employee (with great benefits!), he can look ahead to his own place. But for now, I am happy to have my boy back home.
Now, if I can just get his younger sister through college....
