VACATION - A RELAXING TIME (?)

We just got back from vacation - the family headed to the beach the day school was out.  All four of us were looking forward to it...though the kids would have been much happier if we had let them bring friends.

I hate packing.  I always pack too much - and then still forget things that I needed or wanted to bring, despite my checklist I keep to help remind me of these things.

The kids - especially my son - started whining about the 4 or so hours drive to get there.  As a kid, I enjoyed the nearly two-day car ride from our house to my grandmother's house in North Carolina.  I always liked seeing new places and imagined what it would be like to live there.  I still do that.  Not my kids.  Even with a DVD player and a selection of DVD's, handheld game systems, books, and the radio, they get bored really fast.

Well, we made good time and got to the condo we were renting for five days - a place we had never stayed before.  It was gorgeous!  Almost too much luxury....  I didn't think we'd ever figure out all the controls in the showers, much less the stove, microwave, etc.  It was truly a beautiful penthouse condo with a balcony that went all the way across it - probably three or four times longer than any I had ever seen before. 

We weren't located on the beach this year, but the condo overlooked the bay.  Strike one.  While my husband and I enjoyed watching the variety of boats and jet skis coming and going, plus the pelicans and sea gulls, my kids found it boring.

Next we needed to go to the store to stock up on some groceries.  Strike two.  Spoiled teens don't want to eat in the condo - they want to go out to eat at a restaurant.  My husband tried explaining that one of the main reasons to get a condo is for the full kitchen.  That was okay with them for snacks and breakfast, but not for REAL meals.

They did seem to enjoy the amenities the condo had to offer such as the fitness room and the pools, especially the heated ones.  And, in contrast to last year, we even got our son out on the beach and he seemed to enjoy it.  The walk across the street to the beach wasn't bad at all.

By the end of day two, the kids were bored.  By day three, they were more than just bored - they were practically stir-crazy!  They couldn't fathom that anyone - me - could find sitting on the balcony, reading a book, and drinking a glass of tea while the breeze wafted over me a relaxing or enjoyable scenario.  They wanted to get out and DO stuff - i.e., spend money!  When we explained that we didn't have a lot of extra cash to DO stuff, they got almost angry.  And then I got angry.  Strike three.  Then my midweek vacation depression set in.  Am I the only one who suffers from this syndrome?  I was determined at that moment that I was NEVER going to take them on a vacation again!  Why spend all that money just to be miserable in another state?  I could have stayed home and found things to do there - or have done absolutely nothing.  They would probably be slightly less bored at home.

We all made it through vacation week.  My husband and I had to endure the whining about the drive home or about any stop we made - my son HAD to get home to see his girlfriend!  And we did make it home in pretty good time.

So while the kids were checking in with friends, getting on their computers, and giving the pets the attention they had missed, I was unpacking and starting to do the mountain of laundry.

I think I need another week off to recouperate from vacation.

I HATE SCHOOL!

Okay - anyone who knows me knows that I haven't been in school in a VERY long time.  Of course, like all kids, my two hate school with a passion.  And I'm right there with them hating it, too.  

I don't remember working as hard as I do with them when I was the one in school!  They have so much homework...so many papers...so many projects....  It never stops!  Even over the summer, they will both have summer reading assignments!

I love summers.  I still have to work - I wish I could stay up all night and sleep all day like they will do.  But the good thing is that I only have to get one person up and ready - me!  No waking kids - and husband - multiple times.  No yelling to hurry up.   No worrying that they don't have a clean uniform in the closet.  No making breakfasts or packing lunches.  No remembering to sign permission slips or send checks for anything.  Just me...getting ready in the quiet house...with the only other ones awake being the cats.  It is almost like a holiday...almost....


Thank goodness that this is the last year of the science fair.  Just those two words strike fear into the heart of most mothers I know.  The entire first half of the year is taken up by researching the topic, getting it approved, researching the subject, conducting the experiment, graphing the results, making the display board - whew!  And I don't think either of my kids learned much from the projects.

Don't get me wrong - I know how important school is and I want my kids to do well.  I just hate to see them stressing over things they hate - and that they'll most likely never use again!  I haven't measured the circumference of anything in many years.  I haven't tried to find the value of "n."  I Don't have fond memories of The Red Badge of Courage or Dante's Inferno - in fact, I am still grateful for Cliff Notes!  Shhh!

I do appreciate how hard teachers work.  And like any profession, there are good ones and not so good ones - and even a few great ones!  Thank you to my daughter's 4th grade teacher who recognized that her learning difficulty was undiagnosed ADD.  Thank you to my daughter's middle school math teachers who changed the subject from one she despised to one that she's doing pretty good in.  Thank you to her 6th grade Social Studies teacher who refused to make a terrified child get in front of the class to do her report.  Thank you to all of my son's band teachers who awoke his talent and his love for music - which may play a part in his major in college and his career.  And shame on the teachers who truly seem to dislike their students, and who see my childrens' education as a nuisance....  Thank goodness they were in the minority.


Well, let me get ready to try to enjoy the abbreviated summer.  At least when I get home from work, I don't have to nag the kids to get off the computer and do their homework or to try to get to bed at a decent hour.  I just have to get me to bed at a decent hour!  Yeah...that'll happen!

HAPPY (?) MOTHERS DAY!

I am not a big fan of Mothers Day....  I don't have a problem with other people celebrating - I just don't want to.  My mother passed away in March of 2010, a couple of months shy of her 91st birthday.  May is a tough month in general - first, Mothers Day...then the 19th was her birthday...and the 21st was my parents' anniversary.  Reminder after reminder....

My mother was an awesome mom!  It always seemed to me that she could do anything - and she demonstrated that often.  She could cook, sew, crochet, knit, refinish furniture, do minor plumbing and electrical repairs, and so much more.  She and my father - with my mother doing the majority of the work since my father was blind - put in a tiled floor on our patio.  She painted rooms, made curtains, cleaned, did yard work, did dishes, ironed - and she had a full-time job.

My mother took me to all my doctor's and dentist's appointments.  She took me to dance classes.  She took me shopping.  She took me to the library, helped me with my homework, and quizzed me for tests.  She typed all of my term papers - and attempted to teach me to type.

I tried to help my mother out - probably not as often as I should have.  But I would sometimes cook supper, or at least get things started for her.  I would do some laundry for her.  And once I started driving, I think I took a lot of the load off of her.

My mother put me through college - a private one no less - with the savings bonds she bought every payday.  It was important to her that I get a college education - and she couldn't have been more proud when my graduation fell on her birthday.

My mother was a loving grandmother.  She didn't get to see her grandson or granddaughter as much as she may have liked since we lived an hour away.  But she helped any way possible.  She made clothes and stuffed animals for the kids.  She bought them diapers, clothes, and toys.  She helped me so much when I was a brand new mother with a sickly newborn to care for.

My mother was one of the best friends I ever had.  Whatever good or bad happened to me, I couldn't wait to call and tell her the news.  To this day, when something happens, I want to pick up the phone to call her.  It takes me a minute to realize that I can't.

My husband and I were remembering one Mothers Day that we decided to take my mother out to eat.  We should have known that every restaurant in the greater New Orleans area would be packed.  We went to one place that we knew she liked which was about a 45-minure drive away.  The wait was ridiculously long.  We probably tried at least a couple more places before we finally found a place to eat.  I don't think she really enjoyed that outing, but tried to be gracious about it.

The last 4 years or so of my mother's life were not good ones.  She was suffering from Alzheimer's - and I do mean suffering.  My mother was way too proud of a woman from good hillbilly (or as she would say - "Mountain William!") stock to have ever have wanted to live like that.  It hurt me so much to witness the decline.  She was not in a happy place by far.  She relived unpleasant things from her past, unpleasant things that never happened, and forgot so many good things.  I'm not totally sure that she knew exactly who I was half the time, or that she remembered being a grandmother.

It doesn't feel right to me to celebrate Mothers Day.  It's a day when you honor your mother.  So I guess I honored her by thinking about her...a lot.  I honored her by doing the things for my family that she did for hers - shopping for groceries and doing laundry mainly.

My son didn't understand why I didn't want to go out for Mothers Day.  First, I don't really like to be the center of attention.  (I know some of you who know me well may not believe it.)  I don't need anyone to notice me today just because I gave birth.  Second, I feel very guilty having anyone spend money on me.  I am not a gracious recipient of birthday, Christmas, Valentines Day or anniversary gifts - why should this be any different?

If my kids want to show me appreciation for "birthing them," they can put their dirty dishes in the sink, put their dirty clothes in the hamper, feed the cats and dogs, take out the trash, learn to do laundry - not on this one Sunday, but throughout the year.  I'll bet their grandmother would smile down on them, too.

A CHILD OF THE AGE OF TELEVISION....

I am a certified, dyed-in-the-wool, can't live without it, television junkie.  It all started when I was a child.  Yes, we only had three or four channels back then...no cable...no DVR's or even a VCR...but we had television!  I had a small color television in my room.  (Okay, you don't have to call me spoiled!)  I remember laying in bed on Saturday mornings and watching Bugs Bunny or whatever cartoons were on that one morning of the week.  I remember staying up late and watching The Tonight Show and loving every minute of Johnny Carson's comic genius. I remember staying up really late and watching reruns of Perry Mason.  I remember watching live coverage of sad occasions that I really didn't understand then, such as the funeral train carrying Robert F. Kennedy's body.

I remember watching TV with my father.  He was blind, so many times, I was his "seeing eye daughter" and would tell him what was happening on a show.  He liked Hee Haw and Lawrence Welk.  He was a bit of a TV junkie himself, "watching" everything from the news to sitcoms and game shows.  And he would talk back to the TV all of the time!  I guess that's where I got it from.

I remember trying to watch TV with my mother...but she would fall asleep in front of it many times.  I guess that's where I got that from!  After she retired, I got my mother hooked on soap operas.  I got hooked on a couple during college and she began watching with me.  She loved All My Children and Guiding Light.  I knew her Alzheimer's had really gotten the best of her when she no longer cared what was happening in Pine Valley or Springfield.


The TV - well, usually more than one - stays on in my house usually 24 hours a day.  I watch the news and weather...I love cooking shows...I enjoy reality shows (The Real Housewives are my guilty pleasure!)...I follow American Idol...I am inspired by DIY programs...I relish programs about the supernatural...shows about hoarders make me feel more normal.  In other words, I like a little bit of everything - sometimes anything - except cartoons, where it all began.


It runs in the family, my kids are junkies, too.  I used to tape many, many episodes of Blues Clues, Gullah Gullah Island, and Little Bear to entertain my son as a toddler.  In fact, he pretty much taught himself to read by watching old episodes of The Electric Company with closed captioning on.  He and my daughter watch TV all of the time - mostly anime and MTV now, though she loves to watch movies.


My husband is not immune either.  He usually doesn't discover that he likes a program until it's in syndication - then he Tivo's EVERY episode.  How many times can you watch the same episode of Friends?  He also watches a lot of The History Channel and The Weather Channel.  And he and I have gotten into the bad habit of leaving the TV on all night.  I guess I feel like I'm missing something if I turn it off....


So I guess it's not a big stretch that I have worked for a television station for the past almost twelve years.  One of the perks - cable TV in my office!